Thirty Days to Me

I came across this article right about the time that things ended with Big. If you follow @TheSingleWoman on twitter, then maybe you're also familiar with her story. The Love Cleanse is thirty days focused on you; no dating, no flirting, no cyber-stalking (ahem), and developing healthier habits. 

I tried the love cleanse when my broken heart was new. I thought I could just flip it, like a switch. It turns out, I wasn't ready. At that point, it was so fresh, that I spent all my time thinking about him. Or us. Or me without him. Oye.

I didn't jump right back in. I took a little bit of time off. I started writing; started some new projects; made some new friends and reconnected with some old ones. I definitely took time for myself, but I didn't really let go of the whole dating thing.

When I met someone, I thought maybe I could compromise; try to date casually, but still take time for myself. Apparently, the universe has other plans. While it's easy to think, will I ever meet anyone? Am I just not meant to be happy? Do I not deserve love? When the truth is, if I'm not meeting anyone right now, it's because now just isn't the right time for me to meet anyone. 

After being hit in the head with the proverbial brick several times, it's finally dawned on me - I should be focused on myself right now. No matter how much I want to think that finding love is me focusing on me - at the end of the day, I'm still giving all of my energy to others. Actively trying to meet people and look for love means making others my focus - not me. 

That stops now.

I will try this love cleanse thing; so for the next 30 days, I will focus solely on me - get some projects done, focus on work a little, maybe the gym, hang out with friends - you get the idea. It'll be all me, all the time.

How bad can that be? Right?!