I was talking to Baking Suit about this guy the other day.
"I just don't get it," I said. "I told him I liked guys to be upfront. I wish men would realize that when we say we want him to be upfront, that's not just about what color flowers he'd like at the wedding. We mean about everything - including if he's not interested."
When I meet someone new, one of the first things I tell him is that I'm an upfront person, and I appreciate (and prefer) the same from the person I'm dating.
Those aren't just words. I don't speak just to hear myself talk. I mean what I say - and I say what I mean.
I realize that dating is a game. But the truth is...the game changes when you're older, and you come back to dating after a divorce - or even after you've been single for a while.
At some point, you find yourself not interested in playing games. Whether it's because you know there are more important ways to spend your energy, or you just feel like you don't have time to waste, eventually you just don't want to play anymore.
I'm at that point.
When I tell someone I prefer he be honest, I mean completely. Don't pretend to like me just because you think it's what I want to hear. Don't play hard to get because you think it will keep me interested. Don't try to string me along in case your something better doesn't work out.
All you're doing is wasting my time - and yours.
I think some people just don't feel comfortable with being upfront/direct/blunt even if someone has requested it. It sucks that they can't or won't fulfil your request, but there it is. Unfortunately it's often not possible to get someone else to treat us as we'd like to be treated even if it's just a request about how to reject us.
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