Some fairy tales do come true....

I'm busy today.

Actually, I was busy earlier - and now I'm tired and enjoying the after-glow.

Happy Friday - Cheerio!!

My Resume

Inspiration courtesy of this post at Simply Solo....a blog I highly recommend.

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To whom it may concern:

I am writing to apply for the job of Z's partner and soul mate. Enclosed you will find my resume, which highlights my most recent and relevant experience.

While it's true that this role is slightly different than what I have done in the past, I believe that my skills will transfer nicely. I think you will find that my research and experience will make me a valuable addition to Z's life.

Please feel free to review my resume, and contact me with any questions. I appreciate your time and attention and look forward to your response.

Sincerely,

Girl's Got Shine

**************

Girl's Got Shine

girlsgotshine@gmail.com

Blog

Twitter

Tumblr

Objective:

My objective is an opportunity to be Z's partner and soul mate. I am interested in being someone's equal; I am not looking to be taken care of, nor am I looking to be responsible for anyone else. I am an independent, self-sufficient person and am looking for the same. I would bring my own style to this role, and expect the same from Z. There is no reason that either of us should need to change. If  we are truly a good fit, our styles should blend nicely with only minimal effort. 

Experience and Strengths:

October 2010-Present

Single Woman; Dater Extraordinaire; Fighter of Cooties

Following a year-long "relationship," I entered the single world with a new found sense of self. I've dated several men, including a gamer and a much younger guy. I allowed myself to indulge in a bad-boy crush. I also took a brief sabbatical from dating, in order to better understand myself, my past experiences and mistakes, and cultivate lessons from each.

I have also taken the time to develop my own life. I have friends, family, work and hobbies that keep me fulfilled and busy. I am no longer looking for someone to complete my life, as it is already full and happy. Consequently, I am lower maintenance than most; more focused on honesty and less on games, and therefore easier to work with.

October 2009 - October 2010

Partner in a mutually interested, monogamous non-relationship

Later described as "two people just spending time together as friends," this year-long relationship taught me a lot. Most prominantly, that I had a tendency to use relationships as an excuse to avoid making difficult, yet positive and necessary, life changes. Also that I was geared so much towards pleasing others that I would tend to put their feelings, wants and needs first, even at the expense of my own happiness.

I am pleased to say that in the months following this relationship, I was able to look back with a more objective point of view, and learn quite a bit. With the help of some wonderful friends, I have grown and developed my own life and personality in a way that would make me an asset in any new role.

March 2009 - September 2009

Friend with Benefits; Occasional Date; Dating Novice

Following a heart-breaking divorce, I jumped into the dating scene. In hindsight, I may have done so too quickly, but I did take away valuable lessons from the experience. After a discussion in which it was determined he "saw as more as friends," I allowed myself to become a friend with benefits. I later admitted this was more in an effort to keep the relationship going. I prefer to focus on the positives of that experience, and the fact that I learned my limits in terms of relationships.

Forever before that

Wife

I was a wife longer than I've been single. I married young, but was completely in love and knew exactly what I was doing. I do not view my marriage as a mistake, but rather something that lived its life, and ended. We grew apart as a couple, but not as friends. To this day, he is one of my best friends and someone who I trust more than most.

I learned a lot from the marriage that will help me in future roles. I know the importance of a man-cave; I respect the fact that people need their own space and time alone; I do not ever tell anyone what to do or where to be - and will do plenty on my own; I learned, and can discuss, baseball and know enough about football to pass for conversation.

Weaknesses (or strengths, depending on perspective):

I can be too independent at times

I am very busy

I am reluctant to make room in my life for just anyone

I am still occasionally insecure

I expect to be treated as well as I treat others

I am looking for someone who wants to be with me, and is not doing so out of obligation or to pass the time

I will not settle

References:

X

G

Big
Mr. 28-Year-Old

Crush

No picture is worth a million words

So, about those pictures....

Like I said, my "rule" is that I usually don't engage with people online if they have no profile photo. Is it because I'm shallow and only care about looks? No.

It's because online dating is already surrounded by disconnected feelings. It doesn't feel real; you're not emailing or responding to a person - just a profile. A photo adds an element of personality to your profile. If it's not there, I feel like something is missing.
I also feel vulnerable. I post a photo (several, in fact). So, immediately, the guy without a photo knows more about me than I know about him. That puts me at a disadvantage - not how you want to feel when meeting new people.

The biggest reason? It's a trust issue. Someone who doesn't share a photo seems like they have something to hide.

If I were in a relationship, and wanted to use an online dating site to cheat on my SO - I wouldn't show my photo. Why? Too risky. What if one of my SO's single friends came across my profile? If he sees a female living in my area, with my age and general stats, he won't think anything of it. But if he saw my picture...busted.

Last week, I got a "wink" from a guy who had no profile photo - but he had the best profile I've seen in a while - maybe ever. This was someone I'd want to meet, but the fact that he had no photo worried me. I decided to take a chance, and I sent him a message. He responded, but it was one of those responses where you can't really tell if the person is just being polite, or if he's actually interested.

I caught him online later the same day, so I opened up a chat and asked if he'd like to talk. He said he would - but barely got four lines typed before he started having "connection" problems with the chat function. Then, suddenly, he was offline.

That could be anything: Maybe he was on his phone and lost the signal; maybe he was at work and had to sign off quickly; maybe he legitimately lost his internet connection.

Or maybe he's not really single, and doesn't belong on a dating site meeting people. Maybe the person from whom he needs to hide his profile walked in, and he had to sign off - fast.

But - he messaged me on the site the next day, so I wanted to give him a chance. (See, I'm trying.) So, I made a light-hearted request for a photo, and he offered to send me one through regular email. He did - it's a really nice photo.

But  now...I had something even more valuable. I took the email address he used and searched it on facebook. I found a profile; the photos were hidden, but I could see parts of his wall and friend list. There was activity, and it appeared legit. Cool.

Then, for fun, a few emails later, I said, "So, do I have to guess your name?" He responded by telling me his first name, and joking that I should've guessed to try and win a prize. Which is a great idea. Except...the name he told me? Didn't match the facebook profile.

Who knows the reason - it could be anything. But the truth is, either he lied to me in that email, or his facebook profile is some elaborate hoax, or he's incredibly secretive. In any case, it doesn't really matter how great a profile he constructed, or how good looking he is.

The problem is, that level of distrust is already there. That's no way to start any relationship or friendship. I guess, in a way, not showing a picture really says more about you than you realize.

A picture is worth a thousand words...

Whether we admit it or not, who we date has an awful lot to do with physical attraction. We may not build a long term relationship with someone based on looks, but it certainly has an affect on who we get to know in the first place.

Most experts would agree that your online profile photos, especially the main photo, has a huge impact on how many views your profile gets, and how many messages you receive. There are entire websites devoted to helping you take a professional photo/series of photos to enhance your online image.

If you google online dating profile pictures you can find a ton of advice on photos to use. None of it should be surprising: Choose current photos that highlight your best features; choose at least one full length shot; posed pictures are fine, but candids that show off your personality are also popular. Photos with friends are fine, but not if it's hard to tell which fabulous person is you. Avoid photos of you with members of the gender you're trying to attract - especially if your goal is to find a serious relationship.

Pretty basic, right?

Still, one of the chief complaints about online dating is the focus on looks. Women especially hate the idea that men sit there and ogle through photo after photo, deciding what profiles to look at based on nothing more than a picture. Truthfully, though - how different is that from meeting someone at a party or a bar? When someone approaches you in public - that initial attraction is not based on your sense of humor or IQ.

Listen - I'm no beauty. I don't see myself that way, and when someone asks me for my best features, my looks are always far down on the list of answers. The truth is, how you look is an important part of dating.

I've followed the major rules - my main picture is a close-up of my face, highlighting what I believe to be my best feature (my eyes). Included are a couple of full-length shots, as well as a couple of photos of me on vacation with fabulous backdrops.

Women tend to focus less on looks and more on personality traits when looking for a date. (That's a comment on a trend, not every woman, obviously.) I'm no different, and while I'd be lying if I said physical attraction was not an issue at all - I'm definitely more focused on the profile itself. A guy can be as attractive as they come, but if the profile and/or emails suck - forget about it.

That said - one of my major rules is I won't consider a profile without a picture. In fact, when a site allows me to control the setting, I won't let someone without a picture even send me an email.

Which is a mystery to some. I've been challenged on that before; people have questioned how important profiles really are to me if I'm so focused on a photo. Well, I'll tell you a story tomorrow....but first, I'm wondering what your thoughts are? Would you engage someone online if they had no photo?

The tough thing about modern dating

Is it the horrible online profiles? The endless emails that lead nowhere? The awkward first date with someone you've only "met" online? The strange text messages, or the ones you wish you never sent?

For me, the toughest thing about modern dating is....the breakup that never really happens.

Nowadays, when you date someone, they become part of your online existence. You're friends on facebook, and twitter and foursquare, and - who knows where else? Do you unfriend them? You could, I suppose - but that's your network. It's your life, in some ways. And unfriending is like saying they were never there to begin with - like they didn't matter.

But if you keep them around, you run the risk of seeing things you don't want to see - and knowing things an ex shouldn't really know. Sometimes it pops up when you least expect it. Just when you thought you didn't care anymore - you realize, you do.

Maybe you don't really care about him. Maybe it's just that seeing him with her is upsetting because it's a reminder of where you're not. Not because you want to be with him - but because you know you're not where you want to be.

Or maybe it bothers you to see others be so nice to him. Not because he's not nice, because he is. Not because he doesn't deserve friends, because he does. Maybe just because it hurts sometimes that he was so mean, so hurtful and so cruel - and he got away with it.

The thing is, modern dating also means we have modern friendships. We have more chances to connect; to find friends, and a support group to rally around us when we need them. Sort of like a virtual version of what my friend Sassy Singleton writes about here.

That happened to me over the weekend. I was down - really down - about some things I was seeing about Big. A friend stepped in and really cheered me up. She reminded me that I'm better off without him; and she's right. I am. I guess I just needed the reminder.

I guess the thing is - we could disconnect from the ex. But in this world of online connections and virtual friendships, it's really more about adapting and making that a part of the healing process. Thanks to the online world, we reap the rewards of those added friendships.

Part of growing is learning to take the bad with the good.

Bet you're wondering....

Are you wondering what happened with Crush?

You can catch up by reading the Love is Jeopardy posts here, there, then here and finally there.

Or, if you prefer the Readers' Digest Version:

I asked if he would want to get together, and he said yes. When I brought up the weekend, he said he had plans. He volunteered that it was a date without me asking. Then he mentioned he saw me online on the dating website. I was feeling mixed signals (Why mention the date if he was interested, but why ask about the site if he wasn't?) so I sent a message and just flat-out said I was interested.

His response was that he likes me - but doesn't think he has romantic-type feelings for me. Said he felt that he was being terse, but has been led on by others and did not want to do the same. He also said he's been told before that he's hard to read, which surprises him since he holds nothing back.

I could probably help him understand that, but will only do so if he asks for some friendly input.

Here's my thing: I don't mind that he's not interested in me. Sure, it sucks never being "good enough." And no, that doesn't mean I'm going all woe-is-me or letting him take any shine away. I think it's fair to admit that's how it feels at first - then we recover. 


It's just not meant to be. When it's right, it will be effortless. The truth is, there was a lot that could have made us incompatible, and sometimes people are removed from our life to protect, not hurt. What if I kept getting more and more invested, and things kept progressing - and he did turn out to be another Big, and just pulled the rug out from underneath me? Or what if we both got more invested, and then one of the external factors forced us apart? I learned a good lesson - I got to feel butterflies (even if they weren't mutual).

I know all that's true. Sometimes I just wish that until it is meant to be, the universe (and cupid) would just leave me alone.

But then, I suppose, we couldn't learn the lessons.

Love is Jeopardy - Part Four

You can catch up here: Part One, Part Two, Part Three (I swear, we're almost done!)

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I tossed the lessons back and forth - just walk away, or put myself out there? Knowing when to let go is a challenge, but so is being upfront, especially if it means I might look foolish.

In the end, I went with a compromise. I sent him a message:

The truth is, I login to the site to read emails, and respond if necessary.

More truth: I was trying to ask you out - on, you know, a real date.

If you're interested, cool. If not, that's cool too. 

You're a tough one to read. At least you're not boring.

Then I texted my friend and said, "...now I feel like I'm done, and either he'll talk to me again or he won't." Basically - I know that I did what I could, and I was honest. The next move is his, and I'm okay with that. And if he's not interested, then I can just chalk that up to his issue, eat some Easter candy and move on.

So what's the compromise? I got to be honest - and after I was, it felt right to walk away.

Wall down - check. Risk taken - check. Honesty - check.

Lesson - learned.

Love is Jeopardy - Part Three

You can read part one here and part two here....

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Best guy friend said, "It sounds like Crush could be another Big." 

Meaning only half invested, while I put my whole self into the relationship. Meaning he has demons and baggage that will keep him from investing himself and being honest. Meaning that I should have learned this lesson already; if I jump back in and get hurt, I have no one to blame but myself.

All very true. But the biggest lesson I learned (pun intended) about relationships is to be honest with the person, and myself. That game-playing isn't for me. That losing always sucks, but I can handle it better if I know it was an honest loss, and not something I blew because I played the game wrong.

Guy friend asked me to read my texts again, pretending that it was a friend texting me. (Excellent advice, by the way, and I hate admitting that since guy friend is also my ex.) Truthfully - if a friend told me the same story, I'd tell her to run. Then I'd take her phone and laptop away so she couldn't contact him.

But that's from the outside looking in. Life's not always that simple, which I've learned the hard way. Sometimes, you can't keep the wall up. Sometimes, you have to put yourself, and your heart, on the line and risk it being broken.

Walls are great at keeping out the hurt. The problem is, they also keep out the happy. So I think every now and then, you need to let the wall down, just so you won't forget how.

Even guy friend admitted....

The heart wants what it wants.

(Link) View more Tv Theme Songs Sound Clips and Jeopardy Sound Clips

Love is Jeopardy - Part Two

Continued from here...

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"You weren't on there last night?"

It felt like a challenge. Like he was saying, "Oh no you didn't give up - you were on there last night, and I know it."  And, apparently, he's paying attention to my online habits?! What. The. Hell?

Truth is, yes, I was on that website the night before. I got an email, and they're easier to read on the site than on my phone. Not to mention, as we all know, I occasionally peruse profiles.

What I don't get is - why bring it up? I assumed he mentioned his date as a gentle way of letting me know he's not interested. I down-shifted into friendly chat (Or thought I did...maybe I messed it up?) to let him off the hook, and what does he do? Puts me on the hook.

I ran this by my best guy-friend, and his take was this:

Crush could've thought I was online because I don't like him, and was testing me, and that's why he mentioned the date. My friend also thinks that Crush sounds like a nice enough guy, but has some issues - possibly was very hurt - and is closed off. In his words, "If he's this disconnected before you're even dating, it can only get worse if you do."

His advice was to walk away. One - sometimes it's better to cut your losses; two - if he's interested, it'll "force him to get his head out of his ass." He said that a relationship with someone like this - introverted, dramatic, apparently hurt - could be amazing...or it could be a disaster. That either way, I'm either all in, or all out.

Thing is....I'm not good at the "walking away." I never have been. I'm more of a "put it out there and see what happens" type.

So what do you think I did? What would you do?

(Link) View more Tv Theme Songs Sound Clips and Jeopardy Sound Clips

Love is Jeopardy - Part One

Disclaimer: This is going to be a rant, spanning a few posts in order to keep them manageable. Oh, stop - who are you kidding? You're reading this instead of working anyway.

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This whole Crush thing got way out of control. I blame my allergies, hormones and possibly boredom. Long story short, during a chat, I asked if he would want to get together again, and he said sure. A day or two later, I asked if he'd let me buy him a drink over the weekend. His response was that he had tentative plans Saturday night but "had his doubts" they would happen.

I was perfectly content to leave it at that. He, apparently, was not.

He then volunteered that his plans were a date with someone he met on a dating website. "I don't know why I bother," he said. "Fifty percent of these never even happen, and the fifty percent that do, I usually wish they didn't." 

Now, why tell me that if he was interested in me at all? 

Figuring I had my answer, but not wanting to be rude, I said, "That's why I've basically given up." Just guess what he said. Go ahead - guess. I'll wait. 

(Link) View more Tv Theme Songs Sound Clips and Jeopardy Sound Clips

What I've learned: Butterflies

I've talked about butterflies before. I'll be honest - I really thought I'd found them with Big. I once described him as someone who made me happy just by being around, who was the first person I thought to call with good or bad news, and who I often couldn't wait to see.

But...I think there might have been something missing. I think my feelings for Big developed over time - which is great, don't get me wrong. But there was no initial "spark." You know, that out-of-the-gate feeling that makes you catch your breath just a little, and keeps you smiling for days?

I'll be honest - I never had that with 28 Year Old, either. I liked him - a lot. But it was never an intense attraction, or an I-can't-wait-to-see-him sorta thing. Thing is - since I hadn't felt it before, I didn't feel like I was missing anything. I thought the spark, or attraction or whatever you want to call it, was something that just built over time for me.

Until I felt it with Crush. We went on a date last week, and the minute I saw him - I felt it. It was even more intense when his knee brushed mine, or my hand brushed his arm. A-ma-zing.

I don't know what's going to happen with Crush. But I have learned this: That feeling isn't something I'll ever do without again.

Best of the Worst: An then....

I was so worried I wouldn't have time to search for a guy's edition best of the worst, since it took me a while to find the ladies' edition. Thankfully - this guy emailed me while I was scoping out the female profiles.

Let me start by sharing his profile with you. This is copied and pasted from the site - exactly as it appeared (For the sake of privacy, I've omitted his name [which he shared] and the one detail that sort of gave away the site he's using).

Hello an Thank You for taking the time to view my profile. Ok ladies here it it is about me.

my name is **** . an yes thats my real name lol.I like the following activities,the outdoors-camping-camoeing-hiking--swimming-suntanning-nascar-mtn biking-adk mtns-BBQ's and cuddling with that special someone. I like shoting pool an movies, I'm very talentant & outgoing,never a dull moment with me around lol. Triing new an exciting things an seeing what makes me or us happy an feel good. and I'm into more , Just ask.

What I'm looking for is not a coach potato, but someone who is outgoing & willing to grow. A LTR 

Things I dont like , ppl who are concided judgemental of others they dont take the time to get to know . 

On second thought - I can probably end there, too.

I should give a class....

Bad boys make me smile

"If you can make a girl laugh, you can make her do anything." ~ Marilyn Monroe

Most woman will tell you - bad boys are sexy. Many will tell you that they dated - or at least crushed on - at least one guy who rocked the bad boy charm.

I'll do you one better - I married one.

'Course I also divorced him - which (I thought) pretty much satisfied my bad boy quota for life. True to form, once separated, I dated several guys who were all the furthest thing possible from a bad boy. 

Turns out - "good guys" have cooties, too.

Enter Crush. If it's a bad boy quality - he's got it. Musician? Check. Partier? Check. Emotional? Check. Tattoos? I'll have to get back to you on that. 

So what is it about that guy that is so attractive? If we talked to a psychologist, I bet there's some co-dependence involved. "Oh, he needs saving - let me save him!" I think that was the appeal when I was younger, but things change as you get older grow. At this point in my life, I'm not interested in saving anyone other than myself. 

So, if it's not that - then what's the attraction? Maybe there's something about a bad boy that just seems more real? Or maybe it's the mystery - the challenge of not knowing what makes him tick? 

Heck - I'm no expert. What I do know is a guy who is creative, expressive, and can carry on a conversation without using the number "1" as a word or talking about hunting or showing me his abs - is incredibly attractive.

He makes me smile. Which is the most attractive thing of all.

My line in the sand

I wrote this quick post the other day, after a brief exchange with Crush. I explain it there, if you want to read exactly what happened.

In summary - I dropped a hint, and Crush responded with some communication, which led to nothing more than some witty banter. Leaving me to ponder: If he wasn't interested, he wouldn't have even made that much effort; but if he was interested - he'd have asked me out.

It was sort of the same way when we had our first date. He invited me back to his house - then didn't sit next to me. Again - if he wasn't interested, why invite me - but if he was interested, why not show it when he had the chance?

I've gotten all kinds of feedback from friends on this. Everything from, "He has no balls," (from a guy friend) to, "He's too complicated."

At one time, I was that girl who would have kept pushing. Truthfully, she shines through a little even now, though I tend more towards the, "This is starting to feel like work," point of view. I lose interest, or I believe he's lost interest, and in an effort to not make things more uncomfortable or difficult for anyone - I back off.

I'll be honest - I also don't want to chase a guy. I've done that, and I feel like I'm at a point in life where I should be chased (even if it's just a little bit). I'm not trying to play "hard to get" or anything - I'm just looking for the guy to be honest about what he wants. If he doesn't want to date, that's cool. Just don't send me signals indicating otherwise.

My friends are also divided on the "rules" for this situation, too. Keep dropping hints? Back off altogether? Just flat out ask him if he wants to go on a date? Everything except some sort of love potion/ritual, though I don't think we've totally ruled that out, either.

I wise woman said to me the other night, "There are no rules. Do what you feel." I think she's right. Every relationship is different. I think you know when you should just walk away. There are times when your personal "rules" - your own line in the sand - should absolutely apply, and will get you out of a jam.

Other times, I don't think that line is so clear.

Best of the Worst: Cougar on the prowl

They say that if you're on a dating website, you should look at other women's profiles, to scope out the competition. I've never done that, because I never really saw much point. My goal is never to appeal to the lowest common denominator - I always put my best foot forward. Guess I assumed the right guy would see that, past all the other profiles. *shrugs*

But like I mentioned, I figured it might be fun to look at what women do in their profiles - as long as I was poking fun at the guys' sites. So....

I found a profile of a woman about my age. First, I have to say, she chose the wrong photo as her main profile photo. It's grainy, was obviously taken with a cell phone camera - and is a mirror-shot with an ugly tile background and a soap dispenser - suggesting it was a public bathroom. It's not even the most flattering of her pictures, yet it's the first thing she's showing the men who visit her profile.

She also has a high school photo of herself uploaded. No, I'm not kidding. Like I said, she's about my age - at that time, everyone wore those horrible, off-the-shoulder, faux-gown tops for their senior portrait. (SN: Everyone except me.) Why, in the name of all that is good in the world, would you share that on a dating profile?

What makes all of this even worse? For her profession, she lists photographer and says she owns a studio. Seriously - and your profile picture was taken with your cell phone in a public bathroom?

Listen - I'm no beauty queen. I hate photos of myself, and I there are few things I like less than searching for a picture I can live with enough to post it to a profile. Believe me. Thing is, joking aside - in this context, your profile pictures are your first impression. It's really important they be attractive, show off your best features, and show that you at least cared enough to take the time. Not to mention - guys are visual. Like it or not, looks are what they care about most, and notice first.

At least give them something good to go on.

SN: Cougar was her word, not mine. I'd never refer to a woman like that unless I know it's what she considers herself.

Crush, profiles...and other updates

When things ended with Big, I thought I'd just jump right back into the whole dating thing because...well, because I couldn't imagine being happy without having a guy in my life.

Since then, I've learned that guys and happiness aren't mutually exclusive. In fact, it's better to find a guy who fits your happy than to try and create your happy around a guy. That's what I've been trying to do - and honestly - it's worked.

I tried the online-dating thing, having had success with that in the past. This time - not so much, as some people predicted. But the breakup also taught me to take what I know and build communities from there. What do I know? Twitter and blogging - which, it turns out, are excellent ways to not only meet truly great friends, but also "interests." Crush is back. (OK, OK - I may have the jumped the gun in thinking he was blowing me off.) I'm proceeding with cautious optimism, realizing it may be we are only meant to be friends. Only time will tell.

That being said - I'm less and less interested in "searching" for a guy. Seems that life can take some funny turns if you let it - without using a search function to steer. The way Crush and I met is so cool - and it seems like it's a better way to find someone - at least right now. Between that, some family drama and the new happy I'm building for myself - I see myself going on fewer dates.

Which is an issue - for a dating blog. But, it was recently pointed out to me that this blog is skewed. For example, in the Best of the Worst, I talk about the horrors of guys' online dating profiles. But (and I'm speculating here) ladies' profiles are probably just as horrific, no? I aim to answer that question. Starting this week, we'll be checking out the best of the worst - male and female editions.

I also want to clarify that the best of the worst posts are not intended as a way to make fun of people. If I wanted to do that - I'd share with you where I find them, their user name, etc. I intend it as a fun way of looking at profiles that have flaws - and maybe pointing out some things that could be done to make improvements. If it's not received that way - I'm sorry.

Why am I telling you all this? Possibly because it's late and I'm tired. But I also want to prepare you for fewer posts. Possibly three (maybe four, sometimes) a week, instead of my usual. Plus, you can check out my new tumblr for mini-posts and of course follow me on twitter for micro-mini posts.

Stick with me, folks - this is sure to get interesting.

Best of the Worst: What do you write, exactly?

I ran across a profile the other day that screamed "best of worst" - but of course, I couldn't find it again when I was ready to put my ideas together.

While searching, I did find a profile that made me giggle. I was thisclose to actually emailing this guy, even though that is totally against my promise. According to his profile, he is a writer with a bachelors degree. He loves literature, writing, spirituality and peace, among other things.

His profile reads:

Relationships are like a two mile well, filled with the most disgusting shit. But the top two feet of that well is the sweetest honey we'll ever taste.

Let's not jump in and gobble up all the honey and be left with shit. Gently dip are fingers in from time to time, take a taste and preserve the honey.

Um...who do you suppose pays him to write? I wonder if I could get that job?

In all seriousness - it's an interesting profile. Though - it does seem like he's saying he's looking for something more casual - even though in the 'looking for' section it specifically says he wants a relationship. That's becoming more and more of a pet peeve - guys saying they want a relationship because it's what they think women want to see, and not because it's the truth.

Which is really what makes him one of the worst.