Friday, December 3, 2010

Number Game

If you follow me on twitter, you know I often tweet about dating - mishaps, questions and, yes, occasionally even one that goes well. A couple of weeks ago, I put a question out there to my tweeps: What do you think about women dating younger guys?

I have always considered myself very non-traditional when it comes to all things, including relationships. But for some reason, I've always had this hang up about dating guys younger than me. I used to think it was because I was only attracted to older guys, so it didn't come up. Now I'm wondering if my hang up might be influencing my choices, and closing me off from other possibilities? It's that whole chicken vs egg argument. {sigh}

The whole thing started because I met this guy. He's sweet, funny, cute and smart. All good things, right? But he's eight years younger than me - so I immediately put him in the do-not-date list. Then we started talking more and more, and I started thinking...does he really belong there? If it wasn't for his age (or mine) - would I feel differently?

The general consensus among my tweeps (and assorted other friends) is that age is just a number. That if both people are interested in each other, want the same things, etc. - it should not affect the success of the relationship. It was also pointed out to me (by more than one person) that a man's maturity level has zero to do with his age. Which is true - Big is several years older than me, as was my ex-husband. They both made some very bone-headed, immature, silly choices that one would have thought they'd outgrown.

So, I started thinking - maybe age really is just a number. If I met a guy who was smart, cute, sweet and funny and didn't know his age, I'd be interested. Why should the number on his driver's license change that? 

Of course, I don't know yet if Mr. 28-Year-Old is interested in little ol' me (pun intended). But the fact that I'm willing to find out is a pretty big step in this game.

What do you think?


  1. This younger guy I know (he's six years younger) has been asking me out for months, really stepping it up since the TC and I broke up. I've said no - for exactly the same reasons that you've said. I've always had a hangup about younger guys, and I've always dated older guys.

    Maybe I should give him a chance...

  2. Turns out, Mr. 28-Year-Old is interested. And I've seen him a couple of times.

    I still have some reservations, but definitely far fewer. I'm starting to think that others might be right; that age really is just a number.

  3. Having met Mr. 28-Year-Old myself...I say go for it.

    Mine's 24 and we work pretty well...

  4. I'm quite glad I listened to you. I have a few friends who still question whether this is a good idea. But I figure it's at least worth a chance. Look where the older guys got me, ya know? :)

  5. I have a theory that guys don't really think the way we want them too until after they turn 28 (and have plenty of time to wring out partying, slobbiness, immaturity and stupid bone headed decisions of their lives; though it stands to reason they often regress past 28), so my opinion would be go for it. If you feel an attraction and an interest and it's being returned, what's the harm? Ultimately, age has little to do with it.