I'm one of those people who changes purses and jackets often. As a result, I'm constantly finding pocket-size information that was stuffed somewhere and forgotten.
This morning I found a business card for a Dating Coach who passed out information at a speed dating event I attended. I never spoke with her, but I remember noticing a few people hanging around at the end to talk with her.
I got to thinking... I wonder what a dating coach would say to me?
The thing that probably frustrates me most with dating is meeting people who want something very different from what I want. No matter how great a guy might seem, if you want different things, it just won't work.
What might a coach say about that? I think she'd suggest that I need to be upfront about what I want, and not settle for guys who want any less. I agree - but I find that challenging.
What I want is a relationship - but, I shy away from saying so because men often think that means a woman wants a relationship right that second.
While I do want a relationship, I do not want to rush right into one. I want to meet someone with potential for long-term, get to know him, see if we have a connection, and continue dating and allow that connection to grow, hopefully into something long-term.
But, if I say that, a guy will stop listening after, I don't want to rush into a relationship. He hears that and thinks he's hit the jackpot - a woman who wants the "benefits" of a relationship without the commitment. Of course, he agrees that he "wants the same" - when really he doesn't. What I end up with is a relationship based on a misunderstanding, which goes about as well as you'd expect.
So, I can't say that, either. Which is fine, I'm not looking to mislead or confuse anyone. My problem is if honesty doesn't work, I'm stumped. It made me wonder what a dating coach might suggest.
Then I wondered...what might you suggest?