Sometimes when I look at who Plenty of Fish and OK Cupid want to match me with, I giggle. Mostly just so I don't cry.
I know they have to work with what they've got - but I wish I could just give them a hint.
We're probably not a match if...
• He's wearing camouflage in his profile photo.
• Or really, any photo.
• In fact, if he even owns any camouflage.
• If he has posted a photo of himself holding a fish.
• Or a dead deer he obviously just shot. Or really, any dead animal.
• Or a gun.
• If the name of the town in which he lives includes the word "Falls" or ends in "ville." There may be exceptions to this, but only a few.
• He can not properly spell the name of the town in which he lives.
• If he has posted a shirtless photo.
• Or a bathroom-mirror selfie. C'mon.
• He drinks more than socially.
• He doesn't actually know what socially means.
• He has problems with any other 3rd grade words.
• He owns a snowmobile. Or a kayak.
• He runs marathons and is looking for a partner to run with him.
• He thinks the man should be the head of the household.
• Or that cooking is a "woman's job."