I'm off today. So I spent my morning watching some bad daytime TV.
I caught the beginning of The Wendy Williams Show. I know nothing about Ms. Williams, other than her sense of humor makes me giggle. Also, her legs just go on and on and on. Hmph.
During her "Hot Topics" segment (which I think she kinda stole from The View), she talked about a recent magazine interview in which Jennifer Lopez said she "doesn't like to be alone." (The interview was about why JLo started dating so quickly after her divorce; her answer was she prefers relationships.)
Wendy Williams applauded JLo's admission, saying too often, women who prefer relationships are labeled as weak, when really, it's just a preference.
"Men are not a necessity. Men are a luxury - a luxury I always want to have in my life." - Wendy Williams
I tend to agree - mostly. I do think preferring relationships to being single or casual dating is perfectly normal. People in general are built, and taught, to exist as part of a couple.
I also think we do label people who search for relationships as weak. Of course we also label people who avoid relationships as unsuccessful, or a failure, or afraid to commit, or whatever.
It does take a certain amount of strength to stand on your own, and not rush into a relationship you don't really want. It also takes a certain amount of strength to admit that while you're OK on your own, you're better with another person.
Really, the only weakness is relying on another person - or avoiding vulnerability. Basically, it's weak to do what you think you're expected to do, without staying true to what you really want.
So perhaps we just need to stop with the labels. Instead, maybe we need to encourage women (and men) to really take the time to know what they want - and then be true to themselves.
Maybe the real luxury is finding this wonderful thing (whatever it is) that makes your life just that much better.