I went on a first date with Gardner the other night. We met about a week ago online, chatted via email and text for a few days, and then decided to meet. He seemed very nice, and cool, and fun, and I was actually really excited about the date.
The day of - I was totally drained. I had a terrible day at work, with stress right up until I left (late). Not the best mood for a date, and I realized that going in. I didn't want to cancel, since it was so last minute.
He was on time, was wearing a collared shirt, dress pants and shoes, and he greeted me with a hug. He pulled out chairs and opened doors for me. He picked up the check, without hesitation. He walked me to my car. He didn't try to "steal" a kiss, though he did affectionately put his arm on my back on the way to the car, hug me goodbye and give me a "friendly" kiss; - more cheek than lip, so not too presumptuous.
asked about my ex, and I was honest. When I asked about his, he was vague, and didn't really offer a lot of detail, either in what happened, or how he felt about it. I told him what I do for a living, and when I asked about his work - more vague answers. He said he's a landscaper (hence his nickname) and works for himself. But does that mean he's actually unemployed, and just does this to earn cash - or does he have a bona fide business? I don't know - because he was vague.
Should that matter? I'm not sure. I also didn't like his teeth (which is really, really bitchy of me) and I found myself preferring the longer hair in his pictures than the shorter do his sporting now. Still, I found him attractive, and I'll admit - I like how much he compliments me and seems to like me. I find it attractive that he is willing to say - even as we just met - that he wants a second date, and he really likes me. That takes guts - and that's attractive.
But I still have these red flags. He told me he just took a test to be an aide at a state run facility for developmentally disabled. But he (vaguely) mentioned that he used to work for a phone company, and for an insurance company - and the landscaping thing. So is he one of those guys who goes from job to job? I have little patience for that - I like stability, and consistency. To me, it's a sign of maturity.
I know I haven't been in the best mindset for meeting people in a while - and I'm afraid that has me looking for reasons to shut people out. Add to that the fact that I came into the date from a bad work day, and I figured I wasn't giving this guy a fair shot. He did all the things that I've said I want a date to do - without prompting. He was just a nice guy - cute, funny, nice.
That warrants a second date, right?