Friday, July 8, 2011

Signs are everywhere

"Women might be able to fake orgasms, but men can fake whole relationships." Sharon Stone

For someone who is usually a pretty good judge of character, I kinda suck at reading a guy's interest. I'm really hoping to get better (another reason to keep at this dating thing; I have skills to perfect).

On a first date, I have a tough time identifying the signs that will tell me whether the guy wants a second date. I always tell myself I'll wait and see if I hear from him - but if I really like him, I don't always want to wait. Plus, I feel this need to reach out to him and say "thank you" for the evening, especially if he paid. I blame genetics and the fact that thank you notes were drilled into me starting at birth.

I assume if I were more patient, and waited for him, I'd have a clear answer. Though I've been told this isn't always the case; that some guys are just shy and will think I'm not interested if he doesn't hear from me. Good grief. That being the case - I gotta write the email/text. At least that way, I know I expressed my feelings, and put the ball back in his court.

So I send the thank you. With TG - I think it backfired. I didn't hear from him until I sent the note - and his response was to ask me out again. Of course, most women think that a second date must mean that he's interested - but we know better, don't we? After he gave me the fade away brush off, I think it's safe to say that TG was, in fact, not interested - even after four dates, all of which he suggested.

I found this article at iVillage - 13 Signs He's Just Not Into You (Sorry). It's really about more advanced relationships, beyond the first date stage. Oddly enough - with Big, he did the opposite of all these things, which by their logic, means he was into me.

So I guess there's no fool-proof rule book. Which leaves me where? Being honest and hoping for the best. I guess that's my only fool-proof rule.

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