Wednesday, May 16, 2012

A little work

I've been through many, many breakups in my life. I'm almost always on the receiving end.

I was having problems with one guy, and he suggested we work on things by setting a date night. The following weekend, he planned a date, we had a wonderful night - and then he broke up with me in the car on the way home.

Another guy never said anything, spent the whole day with me, let me take him to a concert and dinner - and then dumped me when I dropped him off at his house.

The bottom line is - boys have cooties.

Kidding (Well, sort of - but not really).

The real lesson is that, you never know when things might take a turn. Relationships are tough, and nothing is a guarantee. Whether you've been together for 10 years or 10 dates, there is a certain amount of work that goes into a successful relationship. Even if it's just checking in, and making sure everything is OK.

I'll never call myself an expert at any of this relationship stuff. But, I try very hard to pay attention to the lessons that each relationship brings.

Unless you happen to be clairvoyant, you can't predict what someone else is feeling or thinking. You can't control it, either. But you can work at not putting your head in the sand, or taking your eye off the ball.

Don't assume you know what he's thinking; and don't ever think he can read your mind. Talk; ask questions; listen to the other person.

I don't know much, but I do know relationships take a little work. Seems to me that the right ones are worth the trouble, too.

4 comments:

  1. Great Advice.

    I hope you're feeling better.

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    Replies
    1. Thank you. I'm doing my best. Definitely getting there. :)

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  2. As I've gotten older, I have noticed that I have to listen to my heart with honesty. If I really pay attention, I can tell pretty soon in if I care enough to really pay attention to him or if I selfishly have him there to merely pay attention to me. Relationships are not easy, but if everyone listened to their hearts sooner and were brave enough to express what they hear, it can at least save everyone a bunch of time.

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  3. I wish I had known this before my break up. Not that it would've saved anything, but I think it would've helped. Good advice for the future. You really can't ever tell what they're thinking until you ask.

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