Friday, September 14, 2012

Deja vu all over again

Last year I met this guy who seemed nice enough. I don't remember which site we were on, but we exchanged IM information and chatted a few times. He was big into movies, but really, beyond that, wasn't very good at conversation (at least not with me). We chatted a few times, and then eventually, just stopped talking.

Around that same time, I discovered a site called If you haven't heard of it, Meetup is actually an online community for people looking to find "real life" friends. You can join groups based on your interests, and then attend in-person activities ("meetups") with like-minded people.

This guy ran the local movie lovers meetup group, which I discovered after I joined.

Even still, we never really chatted again, and then I met Trooper, and then the meetup group was closed down...and life kept moving.

A few weeks back, he messaged me on Plenty of Fish, saying he liked my profile and said he was interested in getting to know more about me. At first, I planned to just ignore the message - after all, we already talked and found out he really isn't interested in me. So not interested, apparently, that he didn't even remember deciding that he wasn't interested.

Thinking about it that way made me irritated, so I messaged him back.
[First Name], right? We've actually met before, and chatted over IM. I was also a member of your movie group over at 
He replied that he was sorry he didn't remember, and apologized for bothering me.

Last week he messaged me again, this time on OK Cupid.
Hi how are you?
Would you like to chat? I'm interested in getting to know you. 

I haven't changed my hair. I didn't switch from glasses to no-glasses. I didn't gain or lose a bunch of weight. I'm the same %$#@!&%$ does he not recognize that we've spoken not once...not twice...but now three times?!
Thanks, but I just started seeing someone. Think we've chatted before. [First Name], right? I was also in the movie group at
I have not heard back again. We're running out of internet, so I'm hoping we're done.

As a side note, OK Cupid has a feature that tracks when you last messaged a person, and displays that information right on his profile. (If you haven't previously contacted him, the site encourages you to send a message.) It takes the guess-work out of, "This person might look familiar....have we talked before?"

I think all dating sites should have this feature. In all fairness to this guy, if you've been dating a while, your brain does get a little fried, and all online profiles start to look alike.

1 comment:

  1. What a tool. Him... not you... just needed to make that clear. :)