When do you let go?

You know that moment in a relationship where you think - this isn't right; how did I get here?! Then you do the swift, easy, spur-of-the-moment-because-you-just-know-it's-right thing and end things, right there, right then?

Yeah, me neither.

When I look back on a dead relationship, I can see where that moment maybe should have been. Where the thread started to unravel, and any normal, rational, sane person would have cut the string and moved on.

Thing is - love isn't always normal, rational, or sane.

Anyone who knows me will tell you I'm that girl who hangs on longer than she should. When I see a problem, I don't immediately run away. I look for a solution. When I don't find a solution - I keep looking. I'm not suggesting there's anything wrong with being persistant, and loyal, and dedicated. Those are excellent traits, particularly with a significant other. Once I promise my love to you - you're sort of stuck with it (whether you like it or not).

That passion does become a problem when I stop looking for a solution, and start hiding from the problem. Or pretending the problem doesn't exist. Or blaming it on circumstances outside the relationship.

I don't do it on purpose. I just get so caught up in how much I love someone, and how much I want things to work because I believe they should, that I stop seeing what's right in front of me.

I think that's when it helps to have a little faith. Faith reminds us that decisions aren't always about how we feel, or even what we can see. Faith is about trusting our heart, and knowing that even if a choice is a little uncomfortable - or even scary - it must be right, at least in that moment.

That's also when it helps to have friends, who really know you. Who don't judge or lecture. Who do ask questions that make you stop and think, and really see what's right in front of you. Or who help you listen, and hear what's already in your heart.

"Some people believe holding on and hanging in there are signs of strength. However, there are times when it takes much more strength to know when to let go - and then do it." Ann Landers