I came across this video the other day: Interviews with guys about, well, guys. Specifically, why they break up with women who seem like a keeper. In other words, a woman in whom they seem interested, things are going well, and then - BAM! They end things.
The video actually raised more questions for me than it answered. So, I'm hoping you, dear reader, can help me sort through some of them. Especially the guys - please and thank you.
The top reasons discussed in the video are:
- Timing is off
- He's not done playing the field
- He's really in like - not love
- He has commitment issues
The timing thing actually makes sense to me. If you meet someone and they are about to move 600 miles away - that's just bad timing. There's not a lot you can do to control that, and I don't think that's really a guy thing. Sometimes, things happen during a relationship, and you do have to make a choice whether you're committed enough to work through the obstacle, or if the relationship isn't that important.
The "playing the field" and "in like, not love" sort of seem the same to me. Either he doesn't feel a connection, or he does, but isn't sure she's the one.
Now, here's my question. The connection - isn't that something that you either feel, or you don't, right away? How would you get to a "breaking up" situation? If there's no connection, or physical attraction, within the first couple of dates, isn't the conversation more like, "I'm not interested, take care," rather than, "We need to end this."
Same thing applies to the whole playing-the-field issue. If you're not sure that this is the person you want to be with - or worse yet, that you want to be with just one person - why are you letting things get exclusive? Maybe it's me, but that just makes no sense.
I've read that "commitment issues" are just a myth; an excuse to avoid a woman who they know isn't the one. Is that true? Or can men (and women, for that matter) find what they want, only to get scared of having it - which of course, presents the risk of losing it?
It seems to me that's something that could scare people. It almost sounds scary to me - and I love a good commitment!
So what do you think?