Friday, November 19, 2010

Super Shiny

Here's my official ruling - boys have cooties. I have determined that, dating or not, I need to find my own happiness. I found this article the other day on Your Tango's twitter feed. It's amazing - seriously, stuff we should all learn in high school. There should be a class. I need this way more than I've ever needed trigonometry. 

"Wanting someone who doesn't want you back is a reflection of your own lack of self-love." Right? Because, as the article points out, when you love someone, you want them to be happy, even if their happiness doesn't include you. Besides - if you love yourself, then you know you deserve to be loved in return. So why would you want someone who doesn't love you? Genius.

"The dull ache and longing is more predictable and safe than the risk of finding something true." So we avoid letting go because that would mean we have to move on, and risk not find something? Yeah, I can see that. It's hard to move on; even harder to do so knowing that you'll have to do it alone. Who will I wake up with on Saturdays? Who will I kiss on New Year's? Who is going to give me a Valentine's Day card? But - until we let go... we won't ever find the person who will do all those things. So we're just hurting ourselves.

"Surround yourself with people and experiences who lift you up. Make a commitment to yourself to take care of you." Brilliant. Last weekend, I saw some things online about Big that really upset me (more on that in other posts). That same night, I was supposed to go out and meet a new bunch of friends - people I knew through twitter and blogs, but whom I had not met in person. I almost didn't go. I was crying and upset and, frankly, scared.

Then it occurred to me - why? Who put him in charge of my happy? No way. It's my happy, darn it - and I want it back!! So I went. You know what? I had an awesome time! Same thing the following day...and then later in the week, I did some great things. Not in terms of men, or dating - but in terms of me. My happiness.

My shine.

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