Tuesday, July 3, 2012

Just fascinating

Less than a week after I updated my online profiles, I met this guy*. He approached me (which almost never happens). He seemed interested - after only a few IMs back and forth, we exchanged phone numbers. The next day, I spoke to him on the phone (which I never do) for about an hour. And he even called me back later that night. He suggested a date later that week, and then called me to wish me a good night. The next day, he suggested maybe we could get together - and two days later, we went on a second date.

Then - nothing. I was busy that weekend, and we texted a bit. Talked on the phone one more time...a few more texts...and then the following Friday, I asked if he wanted to get together over the weekend. 


As I write this, I haven't heard from him (that was more than two days ago), and I know he's online because the handy-dandy dating site told me when I signed in earlier to retrieve a message. He's not techy, so if he's showing up online, it's because he's actually sitting at his computer. 

Smart guy...incredibly handsome...older....with money....and appeared to have very little drama. So it's not actually surprising he decided he wasn't interested (I rarely get to keep the normal ones). 

Of course I don't know him well enough to care about him. But, as I said to my best friend, I'm simply fascinated by this aspect of dating. He was obviously attracted enough to approach me, ask me out on one date, then keep calling me, and go on a second date. He said he liked to take things slow, so we did, and I really only talked/texted with him when he wanted.

In that situation, what makes a guy just up and decide he's no longer interested? I'm not even talking about just me at this point. I've talked to other women, and even other men, who say the same thing has happened to them. After one conversation? I get that. I can even see losing interest after just one date. 

But after a couple dates, when he went out of his way to keep things going - what changes? Is it a game? Is it because he decides there's not enough of a challenge? Is he one of those guys that's afraid to date, so he sticks to women with whom he'd never get serious? 

Just fascinating. 

*I've decided to call him Morgan, because half way through our second date, I decided this was probably what it was like to be on a date with Shemar Moore. Him looking positively irresistible, everyone looking at him wondering, "How did she get a date with him?" and me, trying not to drop food in my lap.


  1. *giggles*

    Dating is weird.
    I've never tried internet dating.. but it sounds... interesting.

  2. Morgan might be waiting for a ballsie movie on your part. Maybe a text of would start something up again...or maybe he'd think you're psycho and not want to see you. Either way, what's the harm?

    1. I could do that - it wouldn't hurt.

      The reason I'm inclined not to is because I know in the end I'd like a mature, confidant guy who isn't afraid to just put himself out there and say what he means, and who also isn't afraid to fight for what he wants.

      A guy who behaves like this isn't that guy. So, even if he was hoping I'd make a move, and I did, to what end? Best case scenario, I manage to keep a guy I really don't want.

      Worst case scenario - I'm painted as a desperate psycho.

      I may end up doing this for research purposes. Depends on how recent developments unfold. ;)