Wednesday, January 19, 2011

I'm done

My friends really are the best. The minute I told my close circle that Mr. 28-Year-Old had called things off, they rallied, making sure I was okay. Of course they were all worried I might take this whole thing the same way I took the Big thing.

I'm happy to say, I did not.

First of all - it hadn't been as long, so I wasn't quite as invested. Don't get me wrong - I like the guy a lot, and I am really disappointed that it didn't work out. It just hadn't gotten as far and as a result, I guess I don't feel like I lost as much.

What I did lose, though, is the will to keep trying. At least for now. In keeping with my resolution, I'm not going to go looking for love. I won't close myself off from love; but I it's going to have to find me. When/if it does - it's going to have to work hard to get (and keep) me, too.

With Big, I lost everything - my self-respect, my happiness, my ability to trust. Plus, I lost him. That's hard; to lose someone else. We don't control others, so if someone doesn't want to be around, there's nothing we can do.

But I do get to control how I feel about me. So, if I notice something is undermining my shine - I can stop that. Which is exactly what I mean to do.

My friends all agree that this is the best thing. That a break, sometimes, is exactly what you need.

We also all agree that when I do date again - it should definitely not be with anyone who lives in that apartment building.


  1. That apt building is just not a good place for you!

    Focus on you and being happy, healthy and having fun...the right guy will pop into your life when you least expect it.

  2. Funny thing is, I've always hated that complex. Even when I was a kid. Always seemed like a very cold place; more like a hotel than a home. You know - a nice place to visit, but not somewhere you want to live. Ironic, no? :)

    Yeah. We'll see what happens. I suspect I will be single for quite some time.

  3. I totally know what you mean...AND we'll have fun in the mean time.