Tuesday, March 5, 2013

Trooper owes me shoes

For years, when things would go wrong in my dating life, I would tell X it was all his fault. After all, I'm supposed to be married to him...if he'd never left me, all this dating nonsense wouldn't be an issue.

But X is really good to me, and besides - I probably can't hold him responsible forever. At some point, it was bound to happen that another great relationship would come along, fail, and that would be the relationship that was supposed to work, and that would be the guy to blame for future disasters.

I believe that baton has officially been passed to Trooper.

Last month, I met this guy on Plenty of Fish. He seemed nice enough, and he seemed interested and willing to put himself out there and ask me out. It took us a couple of weeks to get our schedule in synch, and finally met for drinks one Saturday night.

Side note: I thought we were meeting for dinner, since we met at a restaurant, and he had them seat us at a table. Turned out he wasn't eating, so I just got an appetizer. This should have been a hint, but I missed it completely. Lesson learned.

That Monday he asked if he could "take me to dinner" that week. I said yes. He asked me to pick the restaurant (SN: I hate that. Come with a plan. If I wanted to do all the work, I'd just go to dinner alone.). Parking was tough, so we walked over from an adjacent parking lot. I was concerned about falling on snow, and he laughed at me. No, I'm not kidding. Then he made fun of me. "Oh, don't worry, I'll hold your hand."

I should have ended the date right then, but I'm very polite.

Once we sat down, he announced he wasn't eating - again. Now, I was raised that you don't eat in front of someone who isn't also eating. He informed me that was "stupid." Then he proceeded to tell me he doesn't eat a lot of foods for health reasons...which was a big fat lie because he was looking at the chicken wings at the time.

He eventually admitted he's just a very picky eater. That was evidenced when the waitress came and he agreed to order a sandwich - and then gave her the biggest hassle over choices of sides and additions to the sandwich. Just as embarrassing as calling her hon and then laboring over the bill.

I posted this picture on Trooper's facebook.
Even provided a link and my size.
That's reasonable, right?
 Conversation was tough. First he wanted to hear about my exes, and what had happened. He didn't believe what I told him, which annoyed me - but not nearly as much as when he started to "explain" why men sometimes "need to lie to protect a woman."

I swear it's a miracle I didn't stab him with my fork.

When he started telling me about his ex, and how much he regrets losing her and how he hasn't been able to "close that door all the way" - I put on my coat and said I needed to leave.

Now, I understand that Trooper and I are not meant to be anything more than friends. I understand that everyone - even this guy - comes into my life for a reason. I can't call this date a "mistake." But he laughed, condescended, poked fun, lied, defended lying, accused me of lying, and was rude to me and others.

So, while I understand that ultimately I am responsible for my own choices in life - I still say Trooper owes me shoes.


  1. Chesssus Crust! What a loser!

    I can't believe what I just read.

    I think that LOSER owes you a pair of shoes too.. just for having to DEAL with him.


    I felt like I was there with you... And goading you to stab him with more than the fork... Like the spoon... why? because it would hurt WAY more.